Letter from McIlhenny Corporation:
"Welcome to a new era in the ongoing saga of Megazeux Rules. You find a few subtle changes, and a few character additions/deletions, but nothing major. We hope you will enjoy McIlhenny Co.'s contribution to the world of megazeux. Remember, 'mo hotta, mo betta'. Sincerely,
-the executive board"
Act Twelve: Some like it Hot
*continuing on their mission to find the hottest salsa in the country, the group makes their way to Louisianna. Myth is driving the supercharged viper, and waka is making out with Uma Thurman in the back seat. Inmate and Robert Downey Jr are playing a rousing game of "smokealottacrack."
<myth> man, i can't wait to get some Tabasco (r) Hot Sauce.
<waka> ooh, i love the way it caresses my toungue and ooooooozes down my throat.
*uma pulls waka back into the back seat.
<inmate> hey. remember that tabasco commercial with the mosquito who sucked a guys blood, flew away and then blew up?
<myth> yeah...
<inmate> that was awesome.
*myth continues driving. he points to a field.
<myth> look! a cayenne pepper field!
<waka> lets get out and frolick!
*the viper stops. they all get out, and begin prancing around the pepper field. a dance version of Beck's "Loser" can be heard playing in the background. Inmate tosses peppers gleefully into the air. Robert Downey Jr. smokes some crack.
*moments later, tseng falls out of the sky, and lands on uma thurman, killing her softly with with song.
*tseng gets up. he looks at everyone.
<tseng> what the?! why aren't you guys in la crescenta? (ole!)
<waka> (droneful) our mission is to find the hottest salsa in the world.
<tseng> um......no, your mission is to find greg janson and make him finish megazeux 3.0.
<waka> (droneful) our mission is to find the hottest salsa in the world.
*tseng looks at waka, and notices that his eyes are glazed over. he waves a hand in front of waka's face.
*waka just stares ahead.
*tseng slaps waka around a bit with a large trout.
*waka falls to the ground, still staring into nothing.
*tseng jumps on waka and begins repeatedly stomping on his head.
*nothing.
<tseng> g'ah.
*tseng notices that inmate and myth are zoned out as well.
<tseng> what the frick is going on?
<tseng> (yelling in myth's ear) hey! wake up!
<tseng> (to himself) where is mono, anyway? he was right behind me...
*suddenly, mono comes flying out of the sky, landing on myth, inmate and waka.
<myth> (gets up) what was that?!
<waka> enh? why are we in a pepper field?
*multi appears out of nowhere.
<multi> man. this act sucks. lets go find greg.
*they begin to leave. as they are walking away, uma thurman and robert downey jr jump in front of them.
<robert downey jr.> you can't leave. as employees of the McIlhenny Corporation, you are required to fulfill all contractual agreements, thereby necessitating blah blah blah...
<inmate> screw you, hippie!
<uma> ok.
*waka looks at uma.
<tseng> (to waka) do you happen to know...The Praying Mantis?
<waka> you're looking at him.
*they both get in fighting position and attempt to karate-chop uma thurman and robert downey jr. unfortunately, robert downey jr is too powerful and wrestles them both to the ground.
*tseng dies. robert downey jr has waka in a death hold.
*just as robert downey jr is about to finish the job on waka, multi holds a plate of steaming hot crack up to mr jr's face. robert downey jr drops waka and slowly drifts toward multi.
*multi starts to run. robert follows.
<multi> aieeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*robert downey jr pounces on multi, and begins chewing on his pectoral mussles.
*the pain being too much for multi to bear, his body rapidly changes from his normal frail self to a thick skinned, drooling monster. he quickly devours robert downey jr. he burps for good measure. in the distance, uma thurman can be seen getting in a large pickup truck full of drunk cowboys.
*changing back into multi, he joins the rest of the group, who are already looking for the missing winnebagel.
***end***
<multi> this act sucks!